Thursday, February 09, 2006

Sarah Kolb & Cory Gregory are Useless Human Beings

I certainly need to get back into the regular post habits.

Our story today is about love, friendship and a little something called spreading the charred, dismembered remains of a former friend across two counties. We all know that, I mean, we've all been there. We all have our little spats with our friends. But it always goes the same. You fight, bitch and moan, and a few gallons of gasoline, some hack saws and a long drive later, you're all sunshine and rainbows.

Oh, and kittes too, lots of kitties.

Atleast that's what Sarah thought when she and former friend (and former living person...and former non-burned person....and former in one piece get the point)Adrianne Reynolds were tooling around in Sarah's car with their good but probably a bit suspicious to be hanging out with a couple of 16 year olds because he is 18 buddy Cory.

They went to McDonalds....mmmmm...beefy. The best place to decide to kill someone.

Somewhere along the trip Adrianne and Sarah and a tiff about a boy. know they're growing up when they start to bitch fight about boys!

Unfortunately Adrianne, being new to the area, wasn't aware they you cannot, under any circumstances, disagree with Sarah. Foo' Sarah got peeps 'n shit.

...and they have the aforementioned gasoline and hack saws.

Sarah, completely distraught by the fact that her new friend and her are in a fight, decided that it is time for Adrianne to die.

...Adrianne's remains are discovered burned, her body had been dismembered, and spread across two counties. You can really feel the love when you see the lengths Sarah and Cory went to....umm...not get caught for murder....I mean, love. tell me that ain't love for your friends....BFF!!!!!

Sarah Kolb, you are so useless that it kills the cells in my brain to think about it. You killed someone over the most inconsequential thing; a boy you liked. WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT!???

...oh yeah! YOU DO! You are disgusting. If there is a heaven...I wouldn't care, I'm an atheist...I hope your job, for eternity mind you, is to help Adrianne try to piece her body back together. I mean you'd know how it was taken apart, you were there.

On a more serious note: What kind of person thinks that this is a viable solution to their porblem. Were you afraid that the boy you liked might bone your friend instead of you. Well, if that was the case I'm sure he didn't base his decision on your shining personality or anything, bitch.

You are a waste of time, money and air. Have fun in prison.

Sarah Kolb you are a useless human being.

And Cory have fun with your upcoming trial.

My Diagnosis: 16 year olds don't need cars, cell phones, boyfriends or murder weapons.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Useless Human Beings Presents: The Honorable Mentions

The Honorable Mentions go to those humans who are useless in what can only be described as a 'gafaaa...?' kind of way. They have really only hurt themselves (perhaps some animals...) and so far have avoided (long term) jail time. However do I see bars (as in jail) on the horizon? Some yes and others it will more likely be a coffin.

Our first Honorable Mention for Uselessness comes to us by way of a story that has made headlines in the past couple of days. A 15 year old goes to her dad, tells him that a teacher touched her no no spot. You can imagine the fathers rage. He goes to the school and clocks the teacher and we think the matter is over.

No...not by a long shot.

While investigating, officials found that the girl made the whole story up and recruited 3 friends to back up her lie.

Well bitch, one of them cracked.

Her reason for lying? She had been given a detention for pouring a soda out a two story window onto another student. And who might you be wondering witnessed this incident and helped her get that detention? The teacher her father kocked out.

Good girl....good daddys little girl.

Now, I do not blame the father for this incident because how would any sound minded, sober parent react to news like that?

My Hopes: Public apology to the teacher and her father. And some kind of counseling, there is something wrong with a brain that works that way.

Horizon: Bars...or a life as a D-List hooker.

Next up for Honorable Mention for Uselessness is a group of three women who decided to take a door to door salesman up on his offer.....for a tattoo with a homemade tattoo gun.

Now I have to say that this story gave me some personal rage. I have piercings and a tattoo, I go to the same shop every time because they are clean...I mean hospital clean and they have a great reputation. All of my friends go there and we have all developed personal realtionships with the people who STICK NEEDLES IN OUR BODIES!!!!

...So I was not the least bit suprised to read that all three have infections around their tattoos and have been told to recieve tests for hepatitis and HIV...y'know, things that kill people.

What gets me is that the women didn't think anything about it until one of the women passed out presumably from the infection.

But I ask you...what kind of person gets a tattoo from a random person who shows up on their door step with a homemade tattoo gun? A [slew of swears] person, that's who.

My Hopes: That these ladies save up enough money for the lazer removal. And also that this man is never tried based souly on the stupidity these women. I mean....who does that?

Horizon: Coffins

Our third and final Honorable Mention of Uselessness for today comes from a story about a man and his allergies.

Ricky Ray James Rogers allegedly shot a cat that he claimed was making him sneeze because, as he explained, he is allergic to cats.

I really don't feel the need to go into detail. The man is a fucker.

My Hopes: That God is allergic to Ricky Ray.

Horizon: Bars

Curtis Michael Keith and Rhodena Sevey are suspected Useless Human Beings

I used the word suspected in the title of this post because Curtis Michael Keith is currently on the run. He is being sought for 104 counts of child rape for raping the 13 and 9 year old daughters of his live in girlfriend, Rhodena Sevey.

The apprently also have in tow....her 13 year old daughter. Yes, the very same one he is alleged to have raped...ummm...repeatedly.

Okay...pause for head explody!!!!!


Alright, 104..104....that is a really hiiiiiiiigh number of times.

Time for a joke....? I wonder how his sex life with his girlfriend was...okay, that was not good.

What kind of mother? What the fuck kind of sick ass mother does this to her children. And what kind of sick pervert rapes a child?!!!

Now, I'm all for strange sex fetishes, I have a few myself. But children? And letting your boyfriend do that to your kids?

Does anyone know what child abuse is anymore?

I think this case is mostly self expalainitory....if it isn't, you might end up on this list too.

When they capture the Mr. & Mrs. Fuckbag, I'll let you know.

My Diagnosis: No penis for him. Except for the one that'll be rammed up his ass in jail. She needs a swift kick to the uterus and the children need love...the good kind.



Stop wasting my air!!

Mary Meerschaert is a Useless Human Being

Mary Meerschaert was an honors student at her high school. She was set to graduate summa cum laude. (Make all the jokes you want, it's a real thing.) She had all the standard high school assemblies that every high school in the country has. You know the drill. One of them being the dangers of alcohol and underage drinking.

(See, at my school they had this fake accident scene with all this fake blood.)

Mary was 17 the night of her senior prom. She and her friends decided to drink in the limo on the way to their dance that evening. When one of the people in her group stumbled through the parking lot, obviously drunk, Mary and her friends were approched by school officials. They were all administered breath tests. Nine students failed the test. In Michigan, there is a zero tolerance law, so all the students had to go to court.

In court, Mary faced a judge that had recently visited her school lecturing on the dangers of underaged drinking. So, a little 'haha, irony is funny' there. But this isn't the reason that Mary has made my list.

Mary was subsequently suspended for 5 days and was not going to be allowed to wear her stole that would distinguish her as an honors student among her peers. This seemed to be the only thing that her parents were distraught over. Perhaps I need to make a Useless Parents section.

This punishment was the school's decision. In court, however, Mary and her pals recieved probation and community service. The judge, Michael Martone, an activist against underage drinking, told the group to stay away from alcohol as part of the terms of their probation. I bet you're thinking 'no duh'.

This is where the story gets better, and why Mary is Useless.

After a while the students had all gone off to college, being honors students and all...honors students who couldn't go to a dance sober...dumbasses.

Martone had also gone on his way assuming the matter had been solved and that the kids learned their lesson.....nope.

While searching the internet for reviews, and whatnot, about his newest prevention program, he found instead a site that was basically a huge 'Fuck you' from Mary and all her new college drinking buddies.

There were more than 400 images of Mary and Pals drinking, Passed out, throwing up, etc, with comments about Martone. Shocked by the site, and the fact that he recognized some of the students in the images, he called Mary and some of her friends back into court.

This time, Mary went to jail for 30 days. Wooty woot woot, the legal system works.

Mary had to explain to Martone what some of the slang and certain images meant. She wrote the judge a letter asking for leinency. Martone said that in the letter she told him that she wanted to be a criminal justice major, to which he replied she "might want to consider another line of work." Buuuuuuuuuuuurn.

If I was the judge I would not be able to believe the audacity of that bitch.

Let's go point by point.

-You are underage
-You go to a school function drunk
-You are upset when the school takes action against you
-You disobey the terms of your probation
-You make a website about the judge, using his real name
-You have the gaul to ask for lenincy when this is your 2nd offense as a minor
-You are dumb
-You go to jail for thirty days
-I laugh

Gee...and I thought that to be an honors student you had to be smart.

I did not mention my hate for some of the parents in this situation, or some of the other things that Mary said, like her reasoning for making the website. (She apprently felt betrayed by the legal that why you wanted to be a criminal justice major?!!! To change it from the inside, huh?! Because for you I bet the 2 convictions you have will be your glass ceiling.) I also did not mention the situations with some of the other students involved. (apparenlty one of the girls got a 10 day sentence but was allowed to serve the time on weekends so as not to interupt her studies....yeah...ummm..."see you monday guys! I'm off to jail....again..") I didn't mention most of this because the title is a link...and I bet if you are on the interent..then you can read...otherwise, you might end up on this list.

My Diagnosis: A nice punch to the face.

Mary Meerschaert you are a Useless Human Being. Stop wasting my air!!!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Arlan and Linda Kauffman are Useless Human Beings

What a day for uselessness.

Arlan and Linda Kauffman have been found guilty of health care fraud, Medicare fraud, forced labor and holding clients in involuntary servitude at the Treatment Center they ran. Involuntary servitude?!!! Who does that?

The group home that the Kauffmans ran for the Mentally Ill was also found to have sexually abused patients by forcing them to engage in sexual acts with each other while being video taped. The Kauffmans were found to have restricted even the right to wear clothing for some patients.

Although they were both found guilty, it seems that Arlan has come out as the ring leader claiming a large scale conspiracy against him. His wife Linda was found, by court psychiatrists, to have an extremely dependent personality and was easily manipulated by her husband.

Arlan claims that the patients behavior was voulentary and that the videotapes were later shown to the patients who would see themselves more objectively.


During his three hour statement to the court, (hey if it's your only statement, you'd better make it a long and redundant one.) Arlan apologized to his victims however then proceeded to go into detail about the sex lives of his patients. The judge called him a hypocrite for this.

Okay, first, you take advantage of the impared mental state of your patients, then you try to blame it on a massive conspiracy against you. You sexually abuse your said patients and then blame it all on them and talk at length about their sex lives.

You are a Useless Human Being Arlan Kauffman.

Here's something that has bothered me for a loooooooooooooooooooong time. Like the previous post involving Cesar Rodriguez killing his step daughter Nixzmary Brown, why was there someone who seemingly watched the whole thing happen but did nothing about it. In Nixzmary's case, her mother knew of the abuse she faced and was even present when the beating that led to her death took place. In the same way Linda Kauffman knew what was going on and did nothing, thus gaining her a one way pass to jail for 8 years. (By the way, 8 years for being in on this thing? Psychologically dependent or no, you made your bed...) Arguably you could make the case that Nixzmary's mother stayed in a relationship with a man that abused her child because she felt that this was the right thing to do. She had bore some of his children and marriage is a life long contract that there is no way out of for any reason at all can I stop this run on sentence or do you all not get the joke? Or she was a douche bag who didn't care about her children only the cock she kept in her husbands pants. Is that it? Or was she afraid to leave him. Afraid or not...your child is dead.

So why is it that people stay in situations far longer than they should, or why do they allow things to take place that they know are wrong? Why when they know that they could face jail time?

What the Fuck?!

Any way My Diagnosis: Get him to the butt raping cell in which he belongs and get her a good psychiatrist and a divorce lawyer. She's gonna need them.

Chelsea O'Mahoney is a Useless Human Being

Holy Hell. I don't even know where to begin with this one.

Chelsea O'Mahoney has been sentenced to eight years in prison for taking part in gang related beatings in London. She has been found guilty of filiming her friends on her phone while they beat people in London one night in October of 2003. She also participated in at least one of the attacks by kicking the victim in the head like it "was a football".

She was a 14 at the time these crimes took place.

Fourteen...fourt...four...what the fuck?! One man was beaten to death.

There were many attacks that took place that night in London in what the judge called "an hour long orgy of attacks".

O'Mahoney claimed that she grew up in a disfunctional home with two heroin addicted parents. O'Mahoney had been sent to live with her Aunt because the situation at home was bad.) Her attorney stated this about O'Mahoney's life: "Life was such a hopeless situation that she was found wandering around the streets of London completely unsupervised."

So you go kill people with your friends because that is like totally cool! OMG! LOL! That will solve all your problems and make your parents love you and give you back your childhood. Also, It's totally, like, legal and cool!

Here's some more fun.

O'Mahoney's diary entry for Oct 3, 2004, a few weeks before the attack on Mr Morley (One of the groups victims). She wrote: "Them lot banged up some old harmless man which I fink is bad man, even doe I waz laughing afterwards."

Well, isn't she the, I can't even make a joke because her grammar and spelling are the equivelent of eating horse shit while being rammed up the ass by a family friend at the age of five.

My Diagnosis: Get this girl an abusive relationship, because thats where she's headed.

You are Useless!!! Stop wasting my air!

Side note: My cell phone can't record video. Why does this supposed derelict have a cell phone that can record video if her life is so bad, etc. And what the fuck does a 14 year old need a cell phone for. To call the home that she apparently did not go to to say "Yeah, I'm gonna be out late beating people..."

Monday, January 23, 2006

Cesar Rodriguez is a Useless Human Being

Cesar Rodriguez is accused of beating his step daughter, Nixzmary Brown, age 7, to death.

Well, lets see. You beat a little girl to death. Good for you, way to score points with your other children.

Rodriguez is also accused of sexually molesting Nixzmary and abusing his other five children. He claims that Nixzmary was an unruly child who often took things from her siblings and broke his printer. However, she was a 7 year old victim of physical and sexual abuse at the hands of a parent. I don't think that unruly behavior is completely out of character with an abused child.

Nixzaliz Santiago, the little girls mother, is also being accused of 2nd degree murder. Both have entered a plea of not guilty. Suprise there. Although statements given about the night that Nixzmary was killed include descriptions of banging and cries of "Mommy" coming from the apartment where Nixzmary lived.

There were signs of abuse including the 47 school days that Nixzmary missed. Aparently the abuse was so common in the home that there was a room in the apartment called the "dirty room", a rat infested room in which Nixzmary was left after she was beaten. It contained a litter box for a toilet.

What I find to be the most horrific thing of all is that Nixzmary was apparently being punished for taking a yogurt cup out of the refrigerator. Rodrigues bought the yogurt for "his children" but "refused to give any to" Nixzmary. I certainly hope it made him feel like a big man. Denying inconsequential things to children. Can we say fuckbag?


What the fuck kind of person beats a child? What the fuck kind of person sexually molests a child?! Furthermore what the fuck kind of person stands by and allows someone to beat their child?

A Useless Human Being.

My diagnosis: Removal of all reproductive organs for both. People who think it is okay to beat their kids should know whats it is like not to beable to have any at all.

Fuck you Cesar Rodrigues, Fuck you Nixzaliz Santiago. You are both Useless. So stop wasting my air.

Useless Human Beings of the world be gone.

S'oaky. I would like to start this first blog by saying that there are a lot of useless people in the world. That is to say, people who are taking up precious room and oxygen who are useless to society in general. I am talking about child molesters, rapists, those who believe beating their children is an acceptable form of punishment, the list goes on and on.

I will be using tags such as "Child Abuser", "Rapist" and, of course, "Leech". The "Leech" tag is specifically for those, especially celebrities, who have in no way contributed to society but somehow manage to make it into the headlines of (what may have once been) reputable news sources, such as

When possible I will add links to news sites, like the aforementioned, to give readers the full story. I will try to find multiple links as well.

*Please note that while I base the entries on my own opinions I, in no way, mean to offend anyone. I will defend my position with phrases like "shouldn't beat children to death" and "Holy hell, how did He/She get into office".